parenting topics

- what's the biggest decisionyou've ever had to make? - when you became a parent. (rock guitar, rhythmic clapping) - hi guys, welcome to the mom files! - hi! - okay.- alright. - so we were talking aboutthe fact that once you became a parent, you started makingsome of the biggest decisions of your life, so like when you were 19,

what was your biggest decision? - what i was going to wear outon friday night to the bar. - yeah, so mine was like tequila or vodka? - oh, that's still mydecision on a friday night, but um, not tequila orvodka, white or red. okay, so when you become aparent, you have some heavy decisions to make, so let'sgo through what they are. - it's crazy 'cause you're never prepared for these decisions,and you didn't realize

that having a human meant you would take on all of these responsibilities. - well, you just didn'tknow how it would feel to take on all of the responsibilities until you actually have them in your lap. - and they define you as a mom. - right, and they also definewho becomes your mom-friend. - who's in your group. - and who becomes yourpeople who hate you.

- yeah, true.- there's a lot of haters out there.- we'll talk about that. - oh. kay. - breastfeed?- or bottle feed. - like how do you even make this decision? personally, i feel like i was like kind of forced to breastfeed. - yeah.- i mean, i wanted to, but like i was toldthat's what i had to do.

- i don't know how, well yeah, i agree. it was like, i had the baby and there he was therepopped on my breast. - right.- and so i was like, "oh, i guess i'm a breastfeeder now." - but that's what i mean. the hospital they're not like, "do you want to bottlefeed or breastfeed?" they're like, "put that baby

"on your boob and startfeeding right now." - because they know better than you do. - do they now? i don't know about that. - i don't either any more. - we've changed our mindafter baby number three. - yeah, you know what we like now? fed- is best (tongue click). let's just end that oneright there, alright?

- mic drop.- diapers? - or cloth diapers. (vanessa groaning) i cloth diapers twice. - did you really?- oh, yeah. - oh, for gosh sakes! - i used the service and everything. - uhhgg, i know that they'reso bad for the environment, and i'm so sorry that i have three kids

who have been in disposable diapers, but - and there's a portion of thelandfill from our children. - i know.- and they're diapers. - and that's horrible, but cloth diapers? oh my gosh, i'm sosorry, i could not do it. - it's not that bad. - no, then why aren't you doing it now? - well, because we wereon a road trip once and we had to bringcloth diaper bag with us,

and by the time we gotback from the road trip... - next! no judgment, do what is right,do what is right for you, just not right for me. - should we put a disclaimerin here again that there is no judgment in any of thesethings, we are just having fun. - there's no right or wrong decision here. - vanessa thinks allher decisions are right. - next.- co-sleep?

- or crib sleep. they're both good options. - i agree, and i co-slept. i didn't co-sleep with my first. i co-slept with my second,and i did not co-sleep with this little onebecause i still can't get over the co-sleeping from my first, my third, my second, my middle. oh my gosh, they're all mixed up.

- it's just so hard having tomake all of these decisions. i was thinking about it andi was talking to charlotte, my daughter about this, and we co-slept, my first baby, first six months. she was never in a basinet. she was in the bed with us all the time. and then my other twowere like in the basinet next to me for four monthsand then right to crib. and so, i don't even knowhow i made the decisions.

i don't even remember making a decision. it's just what happened. - here's the point there. do what you want to do.- right? - and what's going to let you sleep. - right, whatever works for you. - yeah.- but i just, i don't remember even making thatdecision, i was so tired. - no.- no.

- you know what? i think we're the only countrythat makes that decision. i think everybody else just co-sleeps. - uh, probably.- yeah. - yeah, co-sleeping's great when it works. - totally. you now have to decide ifyou're going to be on team - vaccinate?- or antivaccinate. we're just gonna leave that one there.

- we'll leave that one.- we're not gonna even touch that one.- not goin' there. - attachment parenting?- or normal parenting. - that's not a thing.- well, what's the difference? i don't know, okay, wait (rewinding). okay, what is attachment parenting? well, don't we all love andare attached to our kids? what is it, what is attachment parenting? tell me right now what it is.

- next.- i mean, it was such a thing, attachment parenting. it's like, well i lovemy kids just like someone who does attachment parenting, and like, i've co-slept, i've not co-slept. i've breastfed exclusively. i've bottle fed. - i think it's a tile thing again, right? - but yeah, like what theheck is attachment parenting?

aren't we all attachment parents? - we just want our kidsto be attached to us. - right? working mom?- or stay-at-home mom. - i'm sorry, get rid of those titles. we're all flipping working moms. we are.- yeah. - weather you go to a officejob or you stay at home, we're all working moms.

- mom is like- full stop. - a million-dollar title. you make a million dollars,- yeah. - but you don't. - no, but it doesn'tmatter if you're going to an office or you're athome, we're all working, done. - she did her own mic drop there. homeschool?- or school. - why did i get stuck with allthe crunchy granola options?

- because i feel like you'rethe one most likely to do that. 'cause if i tried tohomeschool my kids, they would, it would not. - they would probably leave your house. - it would not go well.- they'd come to stay with me. - no, i could homeschoolfor about 20 minutes, and then, no, there's no way. i have so much respectfor people who homeschool. like, i don't know how you do it.

you must have the most incrediblepatience on the planet. - do you? - yeah, how do you do it?- tell us, if you do it. - how do you homeschool? - cause i actually contemplatedit, so it's funny that i got stuck with that one 'causei actually contemplated it for that much of a second, and i was like, i don't uh know. - yeah, i wouldn't know.

if you homeschool, like how do you do it? i find you're amazing if you do it. i'm not made like that. - but this is the thing,where do these like these are the decisions you're now making. you're basically now given ahuman from the moment they come out of your vagina, and youare now making their biggest life decisions that are gonna impact them until they're 20.

- okay, don't, you'restressing people out now. let's just leave it at that.- let's just end it there. okay, what do you thinkwas your biggest decision that you did not realize that you were going to have to make? let us know in the comments below. and make sure to like us,follow us, hang out with us.

you can find us at all over social media. - and come back next weekfor our next mom files.

- bye!- bye! (playful music)